taylrswyft:

This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things

sunbathe:

brucespringsteen:

I’m SCREAMING this girl just asked if I’m doing anything this weekend bc we could hang out and this dude was like “I’M NOT DOING ANYTHING” and she said “sorry I have a family thing all weekend I can’t get out of :/” and turned back to me and proceeded to make plans with me in front of him this is the “*visibly texting* I don’t have a phone” meme on crack

the girl : Aries, Gemini, Capricorn(?), Leo, Libra, Sagittarius, Aquarius.
the dude : Cancer, Virgo, Pisces, Taurus, Scorpio.

guy:

I love buying new things but i hate spending money I’m so angry

nimbus-cloud:

fencer-x:

linda-belcher:

I hate people who can go to sleep as soon as they shut their eyes, like that shit takes me 3 hours, 700 position changes, and a sacrifice to the gods

I gotta write the Great American Novel in my head before sleep comes to take me

Being able to fall asleep instantly almost anywhere is my minor super power

happiersuggestion:

there are people you haven’t met yet who will love you

dutchster:

If you ever think an undercover cop is following you, yell “crime is good!”. the cop is required to yell “no, crime is bad!” at all times. that is the law

immortaltrash:

when you remember something embarrassing you did 6 years ago

wattpadfic:

me: goodnight moon :)

moon: should’ve been saying goodnight 5 hours ago its 4am asshole get your life together

alltaywell:

“Keeping your emotions all locked up is something that’s unfair to you. When you clearly know how you feel. You should say it.” — Taylor Swift